Have you heard about the new pirate movie? It's rated AARRRRGGH! And do you know why? Because of all the booty!
What's a pirate's favorite country? AARRRRGGHentina!
What Star Wars character is really a pirate? AARRRRGGH-2 D-2!
What's a pirate always looking for, even though it's right behind him? His booty!
What does a gourmet pirate add to his dinner? A gAARRRRGGHnish!
What kind of socks does a pirate wear? AARRRRGGHyle!
A pirate walks into a bar with this enormous steering wheel stuck down his pants. The bartender can't help but ask, "What's with the steering wheel?" "ARRRRGGH," the pirate answers, "it's drivin' me nuts."
pirate riddles for sophisticates.
A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"What do you mean?" the pirate replies, "I'm fine."
The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."
"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."
"Well," says the pirate, "One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye."
"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit!"
"Well," says the pirate, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet."